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Step 1:
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Before you speak ask yourself two questions:
- Is the Criticism a part of my stewardship or my business?
- Is the Criticism not only true, but is it necessary?
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Step 2:
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If the answer to both the foregoing questions is "NO", then
BACK OFF! If the answer is "YES", then proceed with the following:
- Ask for and receive permission to criticize.
- Be alone with the one being criticized at a mutually agreeable time and place.
- Be in emotional control and logically explain your concern. No yelling, crying,
swearing, physical or emotional intimidation.
- Stay focused on the issue or behavior. Do not attack self-worth. Separate the issue from their self-esteem.
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Step 3:
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Affirm their worth to you.
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The Art of Receiving Criticism
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Step 1:
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1. STOP! Immediately remove your EGO from the issue or behavior being criticized.
2. LOOK at the person.
3. LISTEN. Do not defend, make an excuse or apologize. Don't speak, LISTEN.
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Step 2:
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Write it down where you can evaluate it.
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Step 3:
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Feed it back without emotion.
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Step 4:
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Excuse yourself from immediate response and set a time and place to respond.
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Step 5:
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Evaluate the criticism and your resources for dealing with it, i.e. time, energy, will.
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Step 6:
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Respond at appointed time and place. The response will fall into one of three categories:
- I will change.
- I disagree and this is why...
- I will not change because I am unwilling or unable to do so.
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